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Tuesday, April 26, 2005

Daddy's Girl

So last night I had dinner and post-dinner additional wine with my father. Of course my tongue loosens when I've been drinking and so does his. We're an awful lot alike, something he admitted to last night. And I got lots of wine to take back to Philly, a shirt, and some money towards getting my car fixed. And filet mignon.

And a whole bunch of unsolicited life advice. Like how he doesn't think I should take the job in NY even if I do get it, since I'm a "top of the pyramid" sort of person and would always regret only having my master's and not finishing the actual PhD. I think he's right, too but I'm still going through with the process. Apparently I should do theater - structure but creativity and no science. Huh.

And when I mentioned to him that I didn't think he'd ever get married again, he corrected me. Hardcore. In fact, he might be married (or engaged at least) by the end of the year to some nurse. And I was floored. I've never met this woman and he's thinking about marrying her? Fuck, he hardly even mentions her existence to me I just figured he was dating another damn nurse, not that he was serious at all. How could he even think about spending the rest of his life with someone I've never even set eyes on? We're still working on our relationship after those years of not speaking (wonder if his nurse knows about that?) and our time together is a bit weird still, now some woman is going to enter the picture? This is not a good idea. Plus, I have absolutely zero wedding prospects and I'm not sure I ever will, so I'm a bit depressed that he might be going in for round two. And mom is really thinking about selling the house and moving.

I know my parents don't owe me anything and that they really do give me a lot, and my mom and I have a very uniquely close relationship. I feel like a petulant child but I feel so lost right now in my own life I don't want the only somewhat constant thing that I've had to change too.

And it snowed Sunday night. Yay, Western NY!


Blogger V said...

I'm a lot like my father too. Wonder if that means we're drawn to people who remind us of our mothers, instead?

Sucks about the lack of stability, that would be really nice during all this upheaval.

2:56 AM  

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